Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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