Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
