Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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