he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Green mimosas i think yes
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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