Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
