And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
