So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Everyone says I win the strip club
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
