I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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