every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
