I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
