Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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