I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
