I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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