i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
