He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
