This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
