I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
