she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
