Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
