when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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