Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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