Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
