Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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