It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
