Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
