Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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