dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
