God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
