you would pick up someone in the library
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
