one might say we're banned from that church
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
