I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
We had sex on a dog bed..
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
