So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
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