So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
