Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
