The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
