you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize