I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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