the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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