He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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