I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
