I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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