singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
