There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
