grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
