I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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