Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
