It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
