why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
