I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
