Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Randomize
