I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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